A love letter to New Orleans after a decade-long relationship.
I’ve been visiting New Orleans for a decade now. I first flew there in 2013. That also was my first time boarding an airplane, which then, was something I never even fathomed myself doing. But I had two opportunities to give it a shot. One was to visit a longtime friend and the second was to experience Mardi Gras.
Upon arrival, I fell in love immediately. So much so that a few months later I eventually moved in with my friend there. At that time, New Orleans was considered and/or regularly in the running for winning the title of murder capital of America. Parallelly, I was shortly removed from losing my best friend who’d been shot numerous times while in his car while also personally surviving multiple armed robberies.
Maybe that’s why I wasn’t bothered when my soon-to-be roommate told me that there was a shootout in front of her home before my arrival. I knew I needed a new environment no matter the reputation or even realities that a new destination may come with.
While my city, Seattle, was never in the conversation for murder capital, I decided while living in New Orleans that this was the reason it felt more threatening. How? See, at the time, my culture celebrated the murder capital cities with honor. Unmentioned territories ignorantly envied that attention. As a result, Seatle felt like it had something to prove to be “put on the map”. In mass, you would see privileged people disregarding their privileges in pursuit of dystopia, bleeding for attention. Today this is called clout.
Now, in contrast, New Orleans understood its unfortunate reputation. Consequently, respect was synonymous with every interaction I ever had there. I also felt safer than I ever had at home. Even as I’d individually wander the streets after midnight people would ask if I was ok. A lot of people struggle to experience these beautiful moments in life because they become possessed by reputation, project their expectations, and influence opportunities of spontaneity.
It’s okay to acknowledge potential danger and have your guard up. But to navigate in expectation of danger usurps the ability to be pleasantly surprised. How can you truly fall in love without taking the risk of being crushed?
The freest black people in the U.S.
Culturally, New Orleans was a breath of fresh air. For starters, it was my first time being fully surrounded by people of African ancestry; but aside from complexion, we shared little behavioral traits. I stood out everywhere I went because of the way I talked, walked, and dressed. There was also a lot more courtesy than what I had ever experienced which initially made me seem rude. It was a widely practiced gesture that you spoke to anyone you crossed paths with or helped someone when an opportunity arose. It seemed any open space on any given street could be used to congregate and could even grow into a block party. This blew my mind because I’ve seen officers in Washington tell us over and over again to “break up” if there was what they felt was too many of “us” together at once.
All these small things made New Orleans feel like its own country within the U.S., which makes sense considering its French history, unique food, dialect, and accents. Then, more blatantly in your face, there’s seeing what I recently declared as the freest black people in America. For clarification, not the most financially well off, popular or celebrated, and not politically or anything else considered ‘free’ at large. Also, maybe this freedom is nothing more than for a moment of the day when accessible. But the freedom exemplified in the second line parades, in my perspective, is at the root of African existence pre-colonialism and pre-societal boundaries.
It’s reconnecting with what’s referred to as ‘the soul’. At a parade, you’ll experience tears, laughter, shouting, etc. It’s shallow and profound. An excuse to get drunk or purge and release all the pinned-up energy that most are left to suppress. At the same time, because I think it’s important to see the whole picture; if we’re being honest, it’s not the most productive way to behave in the modernized world today, which is why it’s unique to New Orleans and not widely adopted. However, it is something that can be traced back for thousands of years and something you see a version of in places throughout the world that were able to maintain a sense of their identity in captivity. From Brazil, Haiti, the Dominican Republic, Jamaica, Cuba, Colombia, and on and on, and of course Africa. The point I’m making is that New Orleans is our best version of that within the United States and it should be celebrated for keeping that part of our ancestry in practice. The history of second lines should be ingrained within us more widely from generation to generation.
Most Recent Experience Visiting
Throughout the years, I would travel to New Orleans for a week or so for birthdays, Halloween, or Mardi Gras with friends and/or Sayu. The recipe was always the same; consume beignets, get wasted, and party all night. However, at the start of 2023, we decided no more drinking or sugar after our honeymoon in Europe in preparation for planning for a baby and wanting to make sure our health was in peak condition. Consequently, we agreed that Bourbon Street was basically off limits after 7 pm so Sayu could prioritize rest and not have to deal with the pressures party environments may cause. Free to explore the city more broadly beyond its temptations was the mission. Beyond exploring we experienced our first ultrasound! As if the confirmation of pregnancy isn’t enough, the first ultrasound of your first child just reinforces the bliss of what’s happening, the beauty, and vulnerability of life. Such a humbling moment.
Had it not been for taking that first trip I don’t know where I’d be. The city historically and personally for me is paramount and a place that will always feel like home. New Orleans shifted my perspective and gave me comfort at a pivotal point in my life. It laid the blueprint for how I travel today which is by opting to frequent local communities vs resorts. I learned there that a city’s magic is typically in the places or amongst the people written off. I’m thankful I was able to interact with the city in a new, more sustainable way, and look forward to taking my future child there to watch them marvel at the freedom exemplified in the streets of NOLA.
#ad Books worth reading:
From The Kingdom Of Kongo To Congo Square
Congo Square – African Root In New Orleans
Visit:
Go to Drago’s and order the char-broiled oysters!!
